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With Twilight fever rising, RoA challenges Gov Rick Perry to come out for Team Jacob.

2010 June 30

Quite a stir of events in our little city over the last couple of days. Yesterday, we found out PETA, an organization that fights for animal rights, is actually on Team Edward. Considering Edward is a vampire and Jacob is a werewolf, we had figured the opposite would be true.

Well today, a reader sent us Governor Perry’s most recent headshot and pointed out the striking resemblance between Rick and Jacob, the young werewolf heartthrob from Twilight. Operating under the principle that if it looks like a duck, then it is a duck, we’ve highlighted 6 characteristics that indicate that Rick Perry is indeed a werewolf. Check it:

Is Rick Perry a closet werewolf?

Rumors abound, but will the truth be found?

Over the years, there have been several rumors of Perry being a werewolf, but no one has ever been able to prove it. People in the know in New York City, famous for being more accepting of werewolves than are Texans, have stated that Perry is a closet werewolf, merely posing as a regular human male since the 70s. Mrs. Perry even allegedly left the governor after she caught him in the act of transforming into a werewolf in their Governor’s Mansion bedroom.

We’ve also heard several stories from folks who’ve seen the governor out and about and on the prowl in his werewolf form. In fact, his late night escapades had allegedly gotten so bad that sources high up in the Republican Party are scared that if word of Perry’s true nature were to come out, it might upset conservative GOP voters and ruin a potential Presidential bid.

The proof is in the pudding, folks. Take a look at the above picture again. He shares SIX physical traits commonly associated with a well known werewolf. And think about how much care and effort he puts into his hair-his THICK, black WEREWOLF-like  hair!!

My only question is: Did Rick Perry shoot the coyote to draw attention away from his own werewolf ways?

Yup, I think that history will show that Governor Rick Perry totally plays for Team Jacob.

Do you think Governor Perry is a werewolf?

Have you ever seen him ‘howling at the moon’?

Do you know someone who was ‘attacked’ while Governor Perry was ‘in true form’?

Who’s hotter: Edward or Jacob?

Will Twilight 3 suck?


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4 Responses leave one →
  1. June 30, 2010

    Rick Perry has gone lengths to cover up his wolf self.
    Even going as far as shooting a coyote [when you know he could just bite his head off]

    I appreciate your detective work, Roary, and look forward to Perry finally coming out. ;)

    • Roary Dillo permalink
      June 30, 2010

      Thanks for stopping by, Ms Legs. Glad you appreciate the very serious investigative reporting we do here at RoA :)

  2. Tim permalink
    July 2, 2010

    David Letterman reported last night that since Eclipse had come out, Sarah Palin was up in her helicopter shooting werewolves now. Wonder how she would feel if she found out her man in Texas was a closet werewolf?

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