UNCONFIRMED RUMOR: Austin suffers intense terrorist attack of aerial aggression on the 4th of July [PICTURES]

2010 July 5

Look, I’m no military expert, but Austin may have suffered some sort of ‘terrorist attack’ last night. It was pretty intense.

Like everyone else on the 4th of July, we were dancing on a rooftop and celebrating America’s birthday. At approximately 9.15PM CDT, we noticed large explosions by the river coming from Auditorium Shores. They looked very much like ‘bombs bursting in air.’ And I can verify the explosions were loud–kinda like that thunderstorm we had a few weeks back.

Take a look at the pics I took with my hipstamatic camera:

Some folks around us said the city had received prior notification about the ‘attack’ but chose to do nothing about it. In fact, one bystander said he could prove that Leffingwell’s administration had received a memo pretty much outlining the complete ‘bombing.’ Other folks, AKA ‘truthers,’ said the city actually planned this display of aerial aggression in an attempt to scare us into giving away more of our rights in this seemingly endless ‘war on weird.’